The Fellowship Today
by BaronCat40
Summary: The fellowship of the ring ends up in 2013. They get jobs, make a general mess of the jobs, and drive their employers crazy. Rated K for mild violence.


The Fellowship goes to 2013, and they get jobs. They make a mess out of said jobs, most of them getting killed in the process.

What happened to Gandalf:

He was looking at the classified ads in the news paper, and found an appealing job as a policeman. He would get to stop people for passing! And give them a ticket, whatever that was.

"Hello, I am looking for a job as a…" Gandalf pulled out his newspaper and looked at the ad, "Po…Leeeese…Man."

"Sure, you can join, I must be an idiot by letting a glowing lunatic like you join, but who cares. We are currently running a speed trap. Go there first. Then, see to the burnt out traffic light.

Speed trap: Hey, that one's speeding. Go and get him!"

"I have to give you a ticket! What do you want it for?"

"Loon," thought the driver as he swerved wildly between cars. Gandalf shoved a slip of paper the sergeant had told him was a ticket thought the window, then turned around his car and drove the wrong way, causing a pileup.

Traffic light:

Somehow Gandalf managed to stay in the police force despite causing an multi-car pileup by sheer idiocy (apparently they were really desperate). He pulled up at the traffic light and got out of the car. The police man had told him to let each lane go in turn, an switch lanes once every minute. Gandalf faced two lanes: "You. Shall not. Pass!" He was run over, and fired. The nice men in the white coats took him as a permanent patient.

Aragorn and Boromier: Housekeepers

They arrived to keep house for a lady who was going on a vacation for a week. They were left alone. Not a good idea. "What's this white box thing?" Who knows. I'll press the button.

It began to whirr. The thing was a microwave. "What is this evil contraption!' He smashed it on the ground, then moved onto every white box he could find(toaster, jewelry box, porcelain vase) Meanwhile, Boromir had discovered the washing machine. He turned it on, and watched it , fascinated. When it went to spin cycle, he went mad though. "What is this evil! Saroun seeks to kill me! He will not!" He pulled out his sword and took aim.

"For Gondor!" He stabbed the washing machine, and water spilled everywhere. He was also electrocuted though his sword.

Aragorn found a can of gas a lighter fluid. He had read the warnings on the drier and oven, and was eager to make a lamp(He could not read and only saw the pictures), or at least a campfire to cook over. He put the gas in the oven and turned it to 500 degrees, and put the lighter fluid in the drier, and turned it on. In a few seconds, the house blew up and they were fired and killed simultoiunsy as the lady came back to get her suitcase.

Merry and Pippin: Library clerks.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Shouted Merry as he rode a book card. Pippin was pausing a shelf, and caused an avalanche. Then, Merry saw the copy machine and did, well, this is kind of rated K.

Frodo and Sam:

Frodo was told to cook the hamburgers. He saw an oddly shaped one, and embarked on a quest to put the One Patty forever to rest in Mount Doom, but he could not find mordor. He went back in to help Sam, but found himself lost in the middle of a street, where he was run over by an escaped Gandalf who had forgotten he never learned to drive until know and was swerving wildly.

Sam was cooking French fires. Each time he put one in the fire, he said: "PO-TA-TOES! Boil-em, mash-em, stick-em-in a stew!" It took quite a while, and he notice he was low on oil. Being the idiot he was, he had never fried before and did not know never to mix hot oil and water. He put some water in the oil, it splattered everywhere. Sam was burned to death as the resterount went up in flames.

Gimli and Leglos:

Round One!

Gimli buried his axe in his oppent's head while Leglos ran around fretting about getting his hair messed up. Gimli was arrested for homicide and Leglos was laughed off his next match because he was knocked out in half a second, as he did nothing but fret about his hair, the idiot.


End file.
